confessions of Zen

[Zenpyre]

Wow...excited na ako na mag start na ang game..so far kuti lang ng mga co Housemyts ko ang naka chat ko...at yung mga dating housemyts...napaka saya nilang ka chat...wow...!!
Sana mayroon akong maging kaibigan dito...yung tunay na kaibigan...wahahaha...!!
So far ala pa akong nababasang blog nang iba tapos ala pa akong blog...Im gonna start writing some blogs now...hehehe..!!!

[Zenpyre]

yey...start na ang game...but c FERGIE palang ang nakakausap ko post-ng start sa game...but i have talked to some prior.

[Zenpyre]

Sorry BBk is di nakaabot ng 100 words confession at diary ko..nakalimutan ko eh..My Bad..!!

It been almost a week since the game started and I havent chated with all the housemyts yet. There are a few others na di ko pa nakakachat. But so far..ok lang naman ang mga naka chat ok..there are otheres who are entresting and I hope I coud get to know them more..but there are some..(but kunti lang) na mga pasaway talaga. Pro early pa nang game and I know that I havent known them so well pa kaya hintay muna ako nang ilang araw before I judge them.

Sana lang di ako ma evict nang ganitong kaaga. Im the kind of person panaman na very competetive. Which reminds me..kailan kaya ang eviction? hhmm...!!

1st week palang at pansin ko na marami na ng co housmyts ko ang may mga warning na ky BBK. Di ko naman cla masisi...we are still new here..we still need some time to adjust..hehe..!!

Cant wait to know my ohter housemyts more..Na ingit talaga ako sa kanila...dami na nilang na chat..but me...kunti palang...ala kaci akong time...very bussy sa skol. Sana ma intindihan nila...and I hope they would give me a chance to know me better and versa...!!

Nakaabot nakaya ako ng atleast 10 words? natatamad na akong magbilang..Im very sleppy na..hehe..!!

My confession for this week ends here..!!

[Zenpyre]

Again..di na ako masyadong nag o-onlyn..!!
Hmm..there were some housemyts that were "cut" from the house..sadly, it is gonna happen..sooner or later. I havent talked to those housemyts before so were my other housemyts I think.. And meron ding mga dinagdag..sadly then di naman cla masyadong nag paparamdam..asan na kaya cla? do they know that they are apart of this?
Nomination na namin..Voted yesterday..and Im not gonna say who I voted for..bka ako malagut no..Sana walang bumuto saakin..wah..dikopa gustong matanggal..It is still early in the game..gusto ko pa clang maka-close..I hope they give me a chance, kahit d masyado akong nag o-onlyn. Im trying my best..waaa..
Nakaka inggit ang mga housemyts ko na sobrang close na with each other..kilan kya ako magkakaroon ng bestfriend rito? sana darating ang panahon na yun? woho..!!
What else..ah yeah..dami na nga mga housemyts ko ang nag kaka violation..buti nalang ako sofar ala pa or kong meron man kunti lang..!!
I cant wait for the eviction..who ever it is..sana di ako..!! ehehehehhe

[Zenpyre]

NO CODENAME: 4 ep dun sa dancer daw xa. taga cebu ata un. zenpyre ata ngalan sa ym. ewan. parang mahirap kapulong at papansin.

Nabasa kuna mga transcript sa nomination natin...I am very releaved na ala masyadong nag bigay saakin ng Ep...

Well..masasabi ko lang rito....sa transcript nato sa isang housemyt ko..ay
totoo naman akong sumasayaw...Ive been dancing all my life> I am just telling the truth walang labis walang kulang...tanong nyo pa sa mga friends ko...and I am not that kind of guy na mag papasikat... o mag papa center of attraction..I am not that stupid na gayahin ang mga taong diko masikmura, yung mga tao na pasikat..

cguro nasabi to ng isa kong housemyt dahil dpa nya ako nakaka usap...I think once palang kami nag kakachat...Alam ko kong sino tong housemyt nato..
Itsura ko daw hindi pang dancer...
hhhmmm....is there a requisite for being a DANCER? let me ask you this housemyt of mine..kailangan bang magkaparihas ng itsura ang mga dancer? hmm..I think your being so narrow minded..!! you are judging the person base in there appearance...ganyan kaba talaga? dancer kaba at alam mo ang do's and dont of being a dancer...and take note...diko cnabi na "dancer" ako...sabi ko I love to dance..that its my passion...I did not say a word na dancer ako o napakagaling ko...!!
In my entire life ngayun ko lang na meet ang ganitong tao...like who the hell is he?
advise ko lang sa yo "napakagaling" na housemyt ko..tingnan mo muna sa salamin ang sarili mo bago ka mag sabi nang kong ano-ano...

What i know is that I am just being true here...what Ive said in my threads, confession, chat is the truth... Im here to make friends...really good friends...di ako sumali dito pra lang magpasikat coz Im not like that...and I dont need that attention...baka ikaw ang pasikat?

Sa mga other housemyts ko...sorry sa mga nasabi ko dito ha? Its just it makes me so sick na meron mag ju-judge sayo base on what you look..or somethin...its just the kind of attitude that makes our life,country so misserable..!!

Sorry talaga sa mga nasabi ko ha...co housemyts ko..at alam ko naman na alam nyo na di ako ganito o ganyan...Im here to have fun and find people that would be very special to me someday..dko gusto maging artista na magpapasikat pa ako...Im OK with my life..Im satisfied with what I am now..with my family, friends etc.

So GOD BLESS and TAKE CARE..!!

[Zenpyre]

Onethings first...I just want to write that my last confession was due to me having too manyproblems na nag-init ang ulo ko and i not in the mood and noon nabasa ku yun pumotok ang pinatubo hehehhe...I was not myself at that time...noon binasa ko nga yun kanina I was thinking to my self (what? I wrote that?) sobrang nahihiya ako sa sarili ko that I exploded like that...its not me...Its just not me...sobrang nahiya talaga ako sa mga nasabi ko...waaa..what was I thinking at that time? Kinain na talaga ng init ng ulo ko ang mga nasabi ko...and i am regreting it right now...sana nga di magalit ang nasabihan ko..!! True naging mayabang nga ako sa iba kong post...pero konti lang..not to the point na pasikat na ha...take note im not like that...waaa...now im turning evil again...pose muna for a sec...breath...

..... ok na ako..I really look stupid, If only ma de-delete ko lang post nayun...nag ka EP pa ako...waaa... it was a double hitter for me...ganyan cguro mangyari if you put too much emotion dito sa game...I am a reality show addict and I should know that puting too much emotion in the game is a disaster...pro primary reason ko rin ay makahanap ng good friends rito...pwedi rin ka relationship..why not...hehehehe

Another day in the house and still konti lang ang nakaka-usap ko sabahay...I am getting nervous sobrang close na nila with each other..gettin redundant na with "close na cla whlie im not" speech. But totoo naman...ngayun almost two hours na akong onlyn but still wala pang nag oonlyn...bussy ata mga tao...hehehe!!

Next confession again...

[Zenpyre]

Wah..it was a total shock for me..Hector was evicted..I was hoping he would have stayed longer coz I can imagine myself being friends with him...i dont know why but there is just something in him that is cool...although I have anticipated it will happen to him early in this game..he is one of the housemyts that dont participate much here in the house..baka cguro d nya alam na kasali sya..or baka bussy lang cguro sa skol or somethin...lyk me...always bussy sa skol but I always find someways para lang maka participate here para hindi maleft-out..minsan nga a-absent pa ako..heheh..!!
Week three and stillkonti pa ang nakaka chat ko..ngayun c anne nalang ang palagi kong na kaka chat..di na ako nakakapag chat nila ate steph, al, ferg, mik at nix...enjoy panaman clang ka chat..!! C cyrill din gusto kong maka chat..coz he seems to be friendly and cool..!!
Sana ma abutan ko cla when onlyn cla..!!

[Zenpyre]

Another week sa house..and ngayun I can say that my relationship with the other housemyts is OK na..di na masyado akong na-o-awkward talking with them.
I can say that I have gotten to become more closer to my other housemyts..like ferg,anne and niz...I hope they feel the same way about me too.
There are other housemyts pa na lately di kona nakakausap..Cna Mik,Al at Ate Steph..I like the three of them specially c ate steph kaci she is very kind. Pre-game palang kami nag kakachat and ngayun di na masyado. Dikami cguro nag aabot. But in the threads, I really like talking to her..she is very mature and may sense kausap.
Cna Al at Mik rin nakakatawa sa mga threads...pro lately lang c mik di na masyadong nag o-onlyn...nuon very active cya..bya bussy lang cguro.
It was flattering that some of my housemyts loved the signature that I made. Kahit I think it wasnt my best at all...heheheh...d sa nagmamayabang ha..hehe..!!
I really appriciate the fact that some of my housemyts loved my posts and our chat together.. specially Ate Steph and Niz (who I feel pnka close ko coz we have lots in common).
Malapit nanaman nomination. Like always mix ang feeling.
Hmm...parang paikot-ikot lang cinasabi ko rito..
but my point is..this week, I am very happy coz finally I feel that Im already very close w/ my housemyts..!!

[Zenpyre]

2nd confession for this week. Pansin ko sa house dami ng mga housemyts ang di nag o-onlyn. Nakakachat ko lately sina Ferg at Anne lang. Kanina I had one of the pinaka-enjoy na chat. The one with Anne. Grabeh ang topak namin, kahit anong topic pinag usapan namin. From sa mga housemyts hanggag about kay BBK. Sana di kami nag violate by talking about BBK. Nabasa naman namin ang rule at wala namang sabi na di kami pwedi mag talk about BBK. VIolation lang pag nag Plot or mag say ng bad things for BBK.
Kanina lang na force evict c Cyrill. Kabago-bago plang na na force evict na cya. Sino kya papalit sa kanya? Hmm...Kung may papalit man cguro girl, kaci naa-wa na ako kina ate steph,anne at niz..cla lang tatlo ang babaye.
Reading the confessions of my other housemyts, and kagaya ko..parehas kami ng iniisip na dami na ng mga housemyt ang di nag-oonlyn. May mga bago naman na pumalit sa ibang housemyt pro di naman nag oonlyn.
Basa ko ang confe ni ate steph and napansin ko na parang ako ang tinutukoy tungkol sa ibang housemyt na nagalit sa risulta sa 1st nomintation.
Hahaha..cguro nagalit ako, but di dahil sa may nag bigay sakin ng EP kundi sa dahil itong nagbigay saakin ng EP ( c KIM) sinabihan pa namana kong di daw ako mukhang dancer? hmm..meron ba namang qualifications sa pagiging dancer. Tapos sinabihan lang naman ako na papansin? hhhmm..sobrang below the belt na para saakin kya pumotk ako noon. But ngayun I am trying to understanf him. Noon I was thinking that ang ginaganito lang ni Kim ay ako..but nalaman ko lang kanina while reading the confessions of my housemyts na they also feel the same way, that merong maypagka "Nakakabadtrip". Baka ganyan lang talaga ang personality nya na iba sa personality namin. Or may ibang dahilan lang cya. That I cant answer. Pro try lang ako pra ma understand cya at iba ko pang housemyts.

[Zenpyre]

Kita na namin result ng 2nd nomination namin. I was expecting ko sino ang makakakuha ng pinaka mataas na EP points. COz lately di masyadong naging onlyn tong c KIM ( minsan lang cya dumalaw sa bahay ata). At meron rin cyang mga na offend sa mga housemyts.. at isa ako ron.
Kahit papano happy naman ako at may nagbugay saakin ng SP..truth is, may guess ako kong sino nag bigay saakin ng SP and napakagaling ko sa guessing game. Heck nalaman ko ng kong sino ang nag bigay saakin ng EP last nomination...hahha..!!
One of this days i would repay her...someday...hahahah..!!
Start na ng 5th week sa loob nang bahay and I was surpirse that I made it this far...hahha...akala ko 1st week tanggal na ako...haha...!!

[Zenpyre]

Wah...isang araw lang ako nawala at dami ko nang na miss..napa osip tuloy ako kong what if mawala ako sabahay for a week kaci finals na namin..wah...baka ako ako i nominate nila...kinabahan tuloy ako...gusto kopa sanang magtagal sa bahay..gusto ko pa cla maka kwentohan at mag asaran at maging close.
After a day tumahimik na ang bahay. All the housemyts are over the post-nomination sicknes...di na cla masyadong nag babanggit kang Kim..buti nalang para tumahimik na ang tao at ang bahay. It is never great na parang feel mo pinag iisahan ka ng mga tao..Naiintindihan ko cya..but naiintindihan ko rin feelings na mga co houemyts ko coz sym kami ng pinag daan lalo na c anne..she never deserves to be treated like that...pormal na pagkatao pa naman cya...lalo na c ate steph who all of us respects...its just not ryt..
One wee more to go and feel ko wala na talaga ako sa bahay....waaa

[Zenpyre]

Another week in the house. I very surprise that Ive made it this far. I never thought that I could reach this far. Maybe I was just lucky coz ang ibang housemyts ko di masyadong active kaya yun..nauna clang lumabas ng bahay kaysa akin.
Birhtday na ngayun ni NIz and I dont know parang galit ata cya saakin. Iwan ko lang. Kaci kanina "BUZZ" ako ng BUZZ sa kanya but wala naman reply. Ewan ko..baka wala lang cguro sa mood.
I di na masyado akong nakadadalaw sa bahay. Every time na pupunta na ako sa mga boards, grabeh napag-iwanan na ako mga housemyts ko. I feel soo left-out minsan sa mga topics nila. Parang wala akong masabi kaya tawa nalang ako ng tawa. Sana di ito maka apecto sa decision nila on who will they vote for.
Nomination na naman. Unti unti nang nawawala ang mga less active sa bahay. Pano kaya pag puro nalang mga "very active" at "active lang kong minsan" ang natira sa bahay? Pano kaya kami mag vovote? What will we do? Sana di ako ang maunang mawala sa mga active people. Gusto ko panaman clang maka "bonding"
Next confession na naman. Sana maka abot pa ako ng next..!!

[Zenpyre]

Im back! More than a day na wala ako sa bahay. Im getting very nervous about my stand sa bahay. I dont know what my housemyts are thinking about me right now. Have to admit, Im feeling left out about their topics. This maybe the feeling when your out of the house longer than you possibly think. Or i guess im being to paranoid. Paranoid saan? Sa skol? Sa house? or Im getting crazy lang.
Ive miss talking to them, Miss ko kulitan with them.
Have to think of way na maging malapit ulit sa kanila or else..bye bye na zen..hehehe
Im ever mawala man ako dito sa bahay.. ok lang cguro atleast ive made some good friends here..made it this far na diko naisip na mangyari..!!
Goodluck to me..!!

[Zenpyre]

Lost count of the number of days since the start nito. Weve reach 50 days napala? Time flies when your having fun. Diko napan sin ah. Yan tuloy nag ka 8ep ako. Bigat ng 8 ep. Sana walang mag bigay saaakin ng EP or else byebye na zenrick.
Dont know if nagtatago mga tao from me (di anman cguro) or bussy lang cguro cla. DI na kami nag aabot sa chat. Ang palagi kong ka chat na c anne di kona naka chat lately.
Bussy cguro cla.
About sa boards..hmm...sobrang tagal kuna cguro nawala sa bahay at dikona cla masabayan sa pinag uusapan nila. Now I feel what my other housemyts felt before..kagaya ni Richard. Di kona masabayan cla. t evern crossed my mind na mag voluntary exit nalang coz di kna cla masabayan. and total alam konaman ang standing ko sa bahay. Alam kona kong cino ang unang mawawala at kong sino ang top 4. Perception kolang. at i think after sa next eviction byebye na ako. THat is my fearless forcast. Either im in the top 7 or 6. My guess narin ako kong sino ang lalabas after sakin but dikonalang i lalagay dito. Baka maka gawa lang ako ng misunderstanding.
Hahah..but if aver ako man ang maaalis. OK alng..i had fun and i met some good friends here. Sana may reunion na board after sa 100th day..hehehe

[Zenpyre]

Hmm..I thought na lalong sasaya na ang bahay kaci summer na. Wala nang gagawin halos lahat ng tao kaci vecation na for the students. But still meron pla kaming gagawin lahat ng mga students for this summer. Ako im applying for a summerjb right now. C niz summer klass, C ferg summer klas din. C Anne? magpapaganda cguro wholse summer. Joke. Summer klac rin cya. Bka mag su-summer kla narin ako para in.
Hm..Still has no time sa pag visit sa bahay. Even now na vecation na namin meron parin akong ginagawa kay di ako maka hirit ng visit sa bahay.
And the are people who said that this season is boring! well who cares, nag pakatotoo lang kami. If boring man kami, that means na hindi kami nag plaplastican dito. If masaya kami masaya, but if wala kami sa mood na mag saya edi ganyan lang, kaya boring. DI naman namin gustong mag paka "saya-sayahan" just for the sake of those people that are reading this ay masasayahan sa amin. Like who care, were here to find some friends, and we did. Thats the buttom line.
But if gusto talaga nila ng syaw...hrhrhrhrhrhr...I'll give them one..they better watch out..!!

[Zenpyre]

Woho..no houserules ngayun now i can say anything I want here..heheh..like ano kya?
Well 1st, dami konang EP from some of my violations tapos from not participating from the boards, prang sapat itong lahat pra akoy ma evict w/out the help of my housemyts nomintations. LORD WAG NAMAN SANA! gusto kopang mag stay sa bahay!
Just read the transcript of our forth household council. I was gald that my housemyts did took what I said the wrong way. "the byebye zenrick speech". Dunno but feel ko yung quatations ko lang yung parang may halong intriga comared sa rest ng mga housemyts. Baka akalain nilang gusto kuna umails. Like HELL no. Di kopa gusto mawala.
One more thing. I really love it when people who do not know me personally "literally" calls me ZEN. Feel ko parang close na namin at tinatawag nila akong "ZEN". Dunno, parang sanay lang ata ako na mga friends ko dito ang tumatawag sakin ng ganyan. Hahahah.. Baba kasayahan ko.
Hmm...ala ata akong napansin na violation sa post ko nato! sayang ang "no rules week".
Bahala nalang!

[Zenpyre]

wahh..I thought walang rules ngayun na week? Nabigyan kami ng EP for posting from a thread that we are not supposed to go. I really thought we are allowed na kaci wala namang rules for the week. Nagkamali cguro kami ng intindi.
Anyway. Nabasa kuna ang transcript sa last nomination. I was very surprise na meron nag bigay saakin ng SP, like some are big points. I was really surprise. I underestimated myself. Akala ko isa ako sa kunti lang ang mabibigyan. SO i was wrong. Or baka naawa lang cla saakin. I dont know but Im very thankful sa lahat ng nagbigay saakin ng SP.
Hay, I felt guilty not giving some of my housemyts the SP. But i was doing it not personall but kinda strategicaly. Alam ko naman na the people na di ko nabigyan ng SP ay yung makakatanggap ng maraming SP kay I thought na kong d ko cla bibigyan walang mawawala sa kanila coz they will still not be voted out.
Holy week wala akong nakausap sa mga housemyts ko. Cguro nag fasting! ako lang cguro ang di nag fasting! sana ok pa kami lahat after the nomination. No hard feelings! Enjoy lang namin to.!

[Zenpyre]

hala c niz ang natanggal? di no i-nexpect yun ha..binigyan kopanaman cya ng 15 sp...ewan ko kong bakit cya natanngal..basta sa calculations ko di naman cya dapat ang na tanngal eh..cguro nagkamali lang ako ng pag compute. We are really gonna NIz. yung pagka smart nya. Sana she will not think na di namin cya gusto kaya cya natanngal.
Hmmm..ako pla ang new houeshead. pano kaya yun? pano ko kaya mapapasaya ang bahay. wala naman ako masyadong alam dito. Mas alam kopa ang survivor ksa rito.
But im working on a good activity. Sana lang magustuhan ng mga housemyt ko...sana lang di will not get angry or anything. But what im sure at is that they will not feel good.
hahaha...gusto ko lang malabas kong ano ang iniisip namin sa isat isa!

[Zenpyre]

Midnight chat kami ni BBk! I dont know whats gotten into him but I felt like he was trying to annoy me or something. I dont know if he was trying to make an argument about a small thing (exclamation point) or it was just a test..to test me maybe! If it was a test then I failed. Dali kong mapikon. I dont know if alam nato ng housemyts ko but kahit Im the kind of person na napakatahik madali akong mapikon. As in sobrang dali kong mapikon. Lalo na that im explanin something but the one that your explainen to doesnt believe you nag iinit ulo ko. Hahaha.. I have nothing againts BBK but he was asking questions about me using an exclamation point, my perception on "mainit ulo" and other stuffs.
About the 5th Household council naman. I dont know I mag pa-participate ako coz even though na check kona mga post ng mga housemyts I did not find any violations that theyve made. Maybe I missed some but I feel and believe na walang na violate mga housemyts ko. Sofar ako parang wala pang na violate! I dont know why we have this kind of "nomination" maybe to stir us up? or just to show some sides of ours! ....
...Im thinking what to post next..but wala akong ma isip..next tym nalang..i hahabol ko..

[Zenpyre]

Saturday na tapos dikopa nastart gawin confession at diary ko..kaya ngayun at 2mrw gagawa pa ako!
Hard to believe na anim nalang kaming natitira! Dikorin ma predict kong sino ang matatanggal ngayun!
Buti pa iba kong housemyt resident na cla dito. Dami ko pang kakaining bigas para maging resident dito but I will still try bka b4 ako matanggal maging resident na ako dito.
Pano kaya malalaman kong sino mananalo rito? I mean meron ba final two or sa pagdating ng final four dun na mag boboto mga jury. Xure na dun ci ate steph sa fial four. AKo sa final five cguro kaci meron akong imunity ngayun. Cguro!
Panay kulitan parin kami sa bahay. Dina cguro ito magbabago. Natural na cguro namin ang pagiging makulit. Kaya dun kulitan. Walang awayan at tampuhan. Buti nalang!
Ala na akong masulat dito kaya hanggang dito nalang muna ako!