Confessions of a Former Straightjacket Wearer

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hi guys! this is my first diary entry for this season. I s'pose to have this as an extension to my other blogs but unfortunately, I couldn't find time to write an entry. btw, I am curently downloading mp3s. basically to sum my boring hours of my waking life is to just look at the things I fancy, blah blah...hey I just gotta boot out for now. I really can't say anything though. must've gone wrong.



nizrhaneabdallah.multiply.com

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hahaha! the word dizzying doesn't mean anything negative. it olds both negative and positive, depends on how the author uses it.

I've chatted with Ate Anne, BBK, Ate Stephanie, and Jomar yesterday. It was great though, cos I really wanted to have a good chat with BBK. And it did, though. (Yay!)

Ate Anne and Ate Steph were friendly and kind enough to chat with me, so was BBK (o'course!). They really made me feel that the Virtual PBB House is a good place for people like us. I hope I made them feel the same way as I did (Na-jumble ko ata yung English ko...radiation sucks).


But as for Jomar...I just didn't like how he asked who BBK was chatting with...eh kami yun!

"And who are these people?!?" OMFG. If he could've rephrased his question then it would've been okay.


I just feel bad at some point. But no worries, mates. Cheer me up, will smile in a few hours, joke.



Anyhoo. Till the next parchment, friends!

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Hoo boy, I'm beginning to feel absolutely down this time.

Y'see, I seem to have overlooked the rules cos I was too excited with getting on with this game. O'course, being able to meet new friends is very exciting. This makes me realise that this excitement also has its downside. Downside in the sense that not all things are excitable, and that getting excited should not be too much.


I'mma observe the rules this time. I've violated a few times but 'a few times' doesn't mean I can excuse myself from not following the rules. Don't worry, BBK, I'mma do well this time! <3


>> Not following the House Rules. I didn't watch PBB on TV, really, but still, that doesn't excuse from violating. I should've gone through the rules one more time to get a clearer view of the game. *rubs eyes*



I'll be careful next time. Till the next parchment.

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I have to calm my nerves this time.

You see, there are just people who can't just control themselves, and that kind of attitude affects me one way or the other.

Ignorant people, as we all know, are very annoying. And if those people have fun in getting other folks into trouble, then they should stop.

I'm talking about Jomar here, and he makes me ill.


Whether he likes it or not, I myself hate to see him posting things like that.


And if he has nothing nice to say, then he's got to keep that mouth closed.


I am feeling very negative over this.

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Hoo boy...two weeks into the game. I think.


After I had posted my previous entry, there's always one guy who I get to talk to. And that guy is Al.

Al, methinks, is a good guy. I just feel like he is indeed. He has this conservative, serious demeanor when I talk to him. He reminds me of my former teacher in Geometry and World History.

Anyhoo, what I'm also implying here is that I am looking forward to talk to the rest of the housemates. There's so much personality around me--- people with different backgrounds and lifestyle and outlook in life. I think I'm with the good crowd I've been hoping to be with for years!

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Two activities. Hwoooh!

I'm so glad I got the first one correctly. I hope I did the same the second time.


What I realised: It's fun to write your most embarrassing moments! Kinda brings me back to Grade School days when people bug you to fill their autograph books. Hahahahahahaha!

The second one was a bit difficult. I don't the other folks yet, and that it's hard to connect myself with them. I just tried to, erm...feel who they really are. Putting Al and Fergie made my life while doing the activity easier, the same goes with Kim and Mik.

Sorta tedious, I s'pose. But it's worth a challenge. (Psych tests, eh?) Erm, those circles made me think of syllogisms.


Till the next parchment, folks!

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Okay. Here's the headcount: nine men, three girls.


I'm feeling a bit surprised why we're getting fewer and fewer. Basta one thing's for sure: I'm sad.


There's a good thing why men should be around: to create balance. Lorl. But since there are 8 men around, that's another issue. Mas madami sila! Boooohoooo! Just kidding.


You see, the Virtual House is, methinks, one of the happiest places in Cyberspace. Really. And the Virtual House is a world in itself.


Al, Ferg, Mik, Kim, Richard, Ron, Zenrick, Cyrill, Hector....and kami: Ate Anne, Ate Steph, ako....and voila! We now have one big happy family! <3333

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Hirap akong pumili ng kung sino ang pwedeng i-nominate. Gaaaaaaah!

You see, it is so hard for me to that cos one thing's for sure: I may have fostered good relationships with a few people here, but voting them off is just plain difficult. (What if they voted you off? *ouch*)

I've made friends with Ate Anne, Ate Steph, Kuya Al, Ferg, and Zenrick (Cyrill too, even Mik) but Kim? Nooop. But for me, Kim is one real guy who has the spunk of a rebel and the words of a literature kid. I'm not judging him, but this is what I see in him. I see in him my friends who have issues (sino ba'ng walang issues, di ba?) and that they rant about everything in this planet. I've gone through it and it sucks to know that people just don't care.

I've been stuck with the housemates for days now, posting stuff on the boards, and helping them with the "chores" *lorl*. I see them as my older brothers and sisters (cos I don't have one, and I've always wished to have one) because they are caring and loving, and they constantly kid around. I love it when I see Ferg poking fun at Ate Steph and Kuya Al, or when the biys pick on Ate Anne, or when everybody gets to share a piece of their lives with each other. Harmonious atmosphere, eh?


Anyhoo, just this for now. For now.

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Gawd. Only an effin' typographical error. Only that.

That typo error caused me to have 4EPs. what a mistake.

I hate it when I type too fast and I tend to overlook what I type. It sucks to see what I type after publishing. What's worse is that I forgot to check it!

Hoo boy. Not another violation. Not another EP. I try to be okay with the rules, and with the people, and with the environment...I try to.

Awwww man. Okay. I gotta straighten up. Now.

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I'm feeling the post-nomination stress already. Everybody goes out to just express how negative they've felt and stuff. Meron na nga nagpaparamdam na aalis na. This is sorta insane.


I also noticed that nobody voted me off---SPs and EPs. I don't know what to say about this. I'm starting to feel that I'm in the middle, sorta the "just-right" phase or something like that. I don't know.


What added to my frustration is that I got 4EPs and another 1.


Hoo boy. I just can't think straight. I'd love to look out for my housemates but...ewan. I'm sorta feeling very negative. I'm doing what I should...and it seems like I'm getting a strange feeling. I know I'm sorta different, I know I am a bit unconventional...but what I am here on the boards is just me. If anybody can't stand what I am then I should know. I am not faking it. I love meeting new friends and communicating with them. I'm sure there's nothing wrong wth that...I think everyone should support enough braincells to just understand.


There's absolutely nothing wrong with I am doing here---I coexist with my virtual housemates and BBK peacefully...and I love it here. If this Virtual House were real then I would really agree to live here!


Sana nga lang.

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Ok. It's cool to have a new housemate around...(welcome Xyruz!) but BBK, c'mon...kawawa naman kami ni Ate Anne at Ate Steph...we're being outnumbered by the Spice Boys! *hahahaha*


I don't know what lies ahead this time. We've got the boys, and we, the girls, are...hmmm sorta troubled...sorta.


The tasks are getting interesting these days...<3


BTW, I feel left-out this time here. I don't know what they're talking about, and it seems that there's this topic that revolves around us constantly...it gets boring. I hope may substance naman...joke. I mean, yung mga topics na pinag-uusapan sa DINING ROOM, BEDROOM...eh something that's current and an eyeopener. Di ba? T.T

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Going nuts.

I've grown an attachment to Kim since Day One, yun nga lang, we haven't chatted. I sort of understand him for his actions and stuff. And from then and there everyone in the household go nuts about him being disrespectful. Maybe his personality is something of a "be yourself"-kind of way. Sometimes, being that doesn't help---you gotta mind others, too. (Btw, Kim is one brave guy, eh?)

Anyhoo. Post-nomination stress? Eeyup. Pre-nomination stress? Eeyup too.

Why?

Cos I felt like I wanted to choke myself, to wring my brain out. I didn't know who to save...until realisation dawned upon me. (Then the Heavens opened up for me!) *"Hallelujah Chorus" by Handel cue here*


Mr. Post-Nomination Stress (yes folks, he's got gender) was like, "Ano, tama na ba ang ginawa mo?"...or maybe it was my conscience rapping up on me...or maybe both. But I know, I did the right thing. I think. (Yes, Descartes, I do think, and therefore I am...)

On a lighter note, I'd like to thank "Codename" for giving me saving points! Whoever you are, from my heart I express my gratitude! Mwah! Merci tellement, et vous serez toujours soyez un bon ami à moi! (Thank you so much, and you will be always be a good friend of mine!) I don't know how to repay you, really, and it's flattering that you saved me, though. Nakakataba ng puso talaga. Thanks again. <3

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You see, it has been quite a long time since I last posted here...and it's a great thing that I've posted something positive here.



I feel good today, now that I get to mingle with my VHs. They're kewl. Having them around is like family, and I have never been this comfortable.


I now feel close with my housemates, most especially with Ate Steph, Zen and Ferg. (Mik and Kuya Al too!) I am also trying to make connections with Kuya Ron and Ate Anne. People here in the Virtual House rock! I also would like to make friends with Xyruz.



<3 with this going on, I feel more active around the house. I get to post a lot this time! Now communicating gets so exciting!

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I remembered a message at the back of a shirt Keeko was wearing: "It's Good To Be King!"

...nah. This time: "it's good to be Queen".


Hey, today's Women's Month and it's a blast to be the Boss...er...one of the bosses. I'm with Ate Anne and Ate Steph. They know better.

Anyhoo, we're gonna make the boys work around the house and to see who's better (and way obedient) than the rest.


Masaya talaga di ba? We girls need to be pampered this time, at wala munang mang-aalaska sa'min! =3 Mauvais garçon n'a pas accordé cette fois ! (No bad boys allowed this time!) Pero we are confident that the PBBFG5 boys are good boys! (Awww...and they're sweet too!)


Oo nga pala. My forthcoming birthday will be a good springboard for this. Actually Ate Steph and Ate Anne had already told the boys about this: they will design and arrange stuff for the 16th.

Ate Anne even put up a new thread for the boys: they will need to answer our questions. (How about a good Math prob for them to work on, then they'll soon give up... just kiddin'!)


Some new social subexperiment, eh?

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Birthday in Cyberspace. In the Virtual House, yes.

I turned 19 yesterday...but I don't feel like I am getting a year older.

Sheeesh.

Thanks to my buddies here in the House, cos they rock and they made my birthday special. (Now I know that there are still a few people who care about me, and whom I care back.)


Anyhoo, Kuya Al is making fun of me, Ron, and Zen. Hahahahah! Kuya Al's a matchmaker--he simply involved us into a love triangle. Kuya Al talaga!

Ferg is gettong sweet these days---he's this genuine boy who'd really love to make you feel special. I appreciate what he did before my birthday. <3 Thanks so much, Ferg!


I'd also like to thank my big Ates---Anne and Steph! They rock! Super-sweet! I wonder kung ano ang magiging kalalabsan ng VHouse pag wala sila...

<3

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Post-Birthday.

Oh well. The stuff at the boards is sorta getting weird. Getting twisted, as I see it. Hahahaha. Yesterday morning, I chanced upon a new thread which says "Final Exam". Hey, I thought. I just had our Finals at the University! There goes another one. So I scan through it and scratched my head. They were difficult, like BBK and the gang could expect me to have my appendix removed, or perform a miracle. (What's worse is that some of the stuff requires a video post on YouTube!)


I have chosen what to do, anyway.



Anyhoo, here comes the good part: Almost everyone gave me saving points!


Yes, my vote got invalid--I wasn't reading the rules. Thanks everyone! =3 hahahahaha!

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hmm. I remember having to trouble m'self with who to evict. It even affected my thinking, sorta.

I was not in good terms with myself when the 3rd Nominations came. Sorta critical, and my conscience kept on rapping at me.


So after too much mental and personal infliction, I decided to drop the card once and for all.

Then I found out that my vote got invalid. At first I thought that I had to conk m'self in the head. I WASN'T READING THE INSTRUCTIONS! *sigh*

There was nothing to complain about, actually.

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"OMG... Nakakagulat talaga...

Well I didn't really expect for fergie to go out of the house. I really though I was next to go. Lo and behold, when I opened a browser and went to pbbfg boards. I was so shocked to find out that he was evicted. I told myself... oh man here we go again. I am sure that another batch of "you dont deserve to stay" is going at me. I am going to be bombarded with disappointing comments again. To be honest I don't really care if I get into the big four or even win. I just want to play a game. And like I said before It's just a game and I don't take anything here personal unless it goes over the line. I know this can be stressful at time and nakakabaliw ren like the real game pero less but it doesn't have to affect you na your hoping na something bad will happen to your opponent. Anyway... we'll see what happens. Just to let people know... I am not mad at anyone... peace tayo lahat. If you are mad at me... I guess there's nothing I can change about that... not like I will deal with you again after this... sige po salamat."



well. whatever. if he was playing then he could have thought of a better strategy. what he did was cheating.